We are not needed.

So I've been taking a theology class this semester and like most people who take a one off class, I already think I'm a master theologian! Not really, it's actually pretty hard to wrap my mind around the things we're doing, but I am finding it interesting!
Anyways, we were talking the other day about God and creation and how without God, creation would cease to exist but without creation, God would still be. That we as created beings are completely dependent on God, yet He is not dependent on us at all. He doesn't need us. We do not complete Him or perfect Him or fulfill in Him something that was missing, because God is completely perfect. He is God and nothing we can do adds to that. The act of His creation did not make him more than He already was. I know this might seem fairly simple and obvious, and in some ways I already knew it but had never really thought about it much. When thinking about why God created the world, I knew it was because of His love and so that we could have a relationship with Him, but on some level I think that I always have thought about it in the sense that God was lonely. That He needed something to fill His life with and so chose to pour out His love on us. That isn't God's character at all. He didn't create us to fulfill a selfish desire of His own and by doing so, showed grace to us. No, He created us because He wanted to. He wanted to have relationship with us because of His love, not to perfect who He already was. I'm not sure if I'm quite conveying what I mean, I'm not a great theologian and I don't understand everything, but what a wonderful thing to know that we were made because we were desired. God knew that we were going to be a sinful, broken people who would reject Him but He still wanted us. He still chose us.
How incredible!

When I think about blogging, most of the time it stresses me out. I love to write but most of the time I feel like I have nothing to say. I feel like I need to have this huge big lesson to share before I can write anything down - but truth be told, the big huge lessons don't come every day. Sometimes I wish they did, and sometimes I wish I didn't have to learn at all. But this isn't about the destination and getting to the point where I know everything there is to know, and understand everything there is to understand. That won't ever happen. It's about the every day journey. The 'ploddings' of life, as my Dad would most likely put it.
But funnily enough, there is a lesson to be told...kind of. It mirrors exactly what I'm saying, or at least what I'm trying to say. I think that so often I feel as if I have to have everything sorted before I can do anything. I have to have my thoughts jotted about before I can put pen to paper, I need to put you in the diary before we can meet up and the craziest thing of all, I need to have my life figured out before I come to God. Now I realise that my last post was along these lines too...but the crazy thing, is that I still haven't got it right. And I probably never will.
But y'know what? I am a messy, broken, sinful person who isn't ever going to get it right on her own. I was at a conference last week and the speaker made a really good point. God promised Abraham and Sarah a baby, and they waited and when they lost patience they tried to receive God's promise by their own efforts. They used Hagar, the slave girl, to 'fulfill' his promise and by doing so, all they did was produce a slave. But when God did fulfill His promise, which He always does, they produce a son. When we try to do things by our own efforts, we only make ourselves slaves, but when we trust God we are made sons.
I don't have to have everything sorted before I come before God. In fact, if I ever think that I have everything sorted then somebody please knock me down a peg. He wants us to come to Him broken and needy. On our knees. Every day. We need him every day, in the constant ploddings of life.
And as for putting pen to paper, I do apologise but I imagine that my blogs are going to become a little less 'sorted' and a little more frequent! Though sometimes I struggle with topics to write about now that I don't have my wonderful children as inspiration! So if anyone has any ideas, then please do me a favour and let me know! I'll even dedicate the post to you! Ain't that wonderful...